E-fundamentalism

If my grandparents' prayers were ever to be answered and I married a man it would definitely be a Fundamentalist Mormon!  The more wives the better!

Firstly, the more wives there are the less nights a week I have to lie about my headache. Secondly, a polygamist's wives are bound to be far better wives than I have ever been. I will never again have to dry myself with a tea towel because there are no clean towels left!

Mostly though, I just love Big Love. That and it would show my grandparents that they need to be more specific when they pray!

So, what does this have to do with anything? Only another reason I love
e-books so much: the ability to download cult/religious fanatic material without the risks involved in obtaining them in person. I know myself well enough by now, I ring to cancel a monthly charity sponsorship and hang up donating twice as much a month in addition to committing to selling books of super prize raffle tickets. If I were to get these books in person I would acquire them for the bargain price of the deed to our house and the pledge of a millennium of service. 

To the great fear of my family I have worked a block away from a Scientology Centre for a few years. The image of my mother's stern look of disapproval triggered every time I walk past has stopped me from going in to buy a copy of Dianetics.  Thank you e-books!

Sadly though, the first chapter is not 'Does Jumping on Oprah's Couch Like a Tool Mean You're Mentally Ill'. Despite the long wait to get my hands on this book, by page five I was bored. Turns out I'm not going to be a Scientologist. Disappointing.

I might try harder to read it on the weekend. That is, after I read my e-copy of the Book of Mormon and explore my calling to plural marriage.

In the meantime, I am going to find some paper towel to dry a coffee cup because all my tea towels are in the bathroom.